Stupid fate.

I love my friends...I would seriously be hanging upside down from a light post or something if I didn't have my friends. My family helps too but..yeah. Today was a little better. I'm going to some back to school bash tonight...I dunno. I hope it'll be fun. I hope I hope I HOPE. Gahh.
My room is a mess and I can't pick it up or I will...find things...that will not make me happy. Cuz I kinda had a tantrum the other day and threw a picture across the room and screamed at it and then had a breakdown on my bed. Wow.
Whatever.
I'll be fine.
Eventually. I guess it's starting to get a little better. I haven't cried today yet. Okay so...almost. It was very close. RAAAHH.
You know what bothers me? When people tell me it's fine and I need to get over it. I've prolly already said this before but Imma say it again.
URGGG!!! I can't just 'Get over' it. It just DOESN'T happen that way! and then today..my friend's talking to me and goes 'so..who do you like?' and I stare at her like...seriously? You think I get over things that fast? Yeah...but...yeah. Everything happens for a reason. I just gotta. keep. telling myself that. It happens for a reason...a reason...
What's the reason? I don't even know. People ask what happened. I just...mutter..'he broke up with me.' and they go 'why' and I usually just shrug and say 'I dunno. He wasn't happy.' I hate when people ask that. I hate it. Why? Why why why why? WHY? Well...because I guess that's just what fate had in store for me. Psh, yeah I don't like it. At all. but I can't change it. and it won't change. so I just have to try and move on. cuz otherwise it's just gonna keep hurting.
Wow. and I thought I was getting better. A single picture makes me start hyperventilating. That's not right. And then just now, I tried eating food. Well...mike and ikes. it makes me feel sick! I didn't even finish my bag of chips at lunch today. I did down my apple juice tho. Apple juice is good...haha:P
Well...my stomach's hurting again.
Imma go lay down...

-Kiera