Hello World.

My life is so extremely hectic lately. Not only do I have to go to musical practice from 3 to 10 every day, but I my parents also decide they want to argue with me nonstop lately. And to add to that, we're so poor right now, we can't even get a turkey for thanksgiving to feed my gigantic family. I don't think Christmas is gonna be the best, but...it's okay. I feel bad. Cuz if I wasn't in show choir, and musical and all that stuff...maybe we'd have extra money to do more stuff. It's really hard. It's hard when you never get to see your family cuz you're constantly at the school auditorium and your scared because you've got 3 more practices and the musical is NOT done. O.o It's hard when you're friends ditch you for a cute guy, when you'd ditch the cutest guy in the universe for them. It's hard when you can't see anything cuz your glasses broke and you can't afford to make an appointment for new ones. It's hard when you don't have the money to get yourself something to eat at play practice for dinner break. It's hard when guys look at you like the freak you are.
But enough complaining. I'm lucky too. I have a family that loves me...great friends...even if they both can be imperfect sometimes. Everyone can. Even if some do more than others.
Lately, everything's just been so difficult. I wish there was someone who'd hug me. REALLY hug me. Like before and..just...hug me.
I could write so many things right now. and almost all of them I don't want to because
a)they will sound absolutely pathetic
b)I don't want the person every one of them are about to read them.

RAAAWR.

Then there's those little bitty things that brighten your day and just make you think...you know? Everything is gonna be okayy.

Like...getting home and seeing my little siblings sleeping..or getting  home and seeing them running wild around the house. Or sitting in the car idle in the driveway, talking to my mom for a half an hour. Or squeezing all my friends onto a couch and watching a scary movie and screaming and laughing. Or looking at someone that you can see is gonna be happy. That you want to be happy more than you want yourself. And knowing they'll be okay...it helps me know I'm gonna be okay. I kinda just changed persons there.
Or the little girl with the pigtails who smiles at you in walmart, holding onto her mommy's hand.
Don't you wish you could go back to being 4 years old? Nothing really mattered like it does now. The biggest of your worries were that you lost your favorite toy or that you didn't want to take a nap.
I guess what I'm saying is...no matter how hard things get, look at the little things that make you happy. The little things are sometimes the things that can make the biggest difference:)

-Kiera