It's surprising, but this summer has gone by extremely fast. I'm excited to start high school, but I dunno if I'm ready for summer to be over. Being in Show Choir, and Choir and a buncha stuff means I won't have time to sit and chillax during the school year, especially when it comes to Show Choir seasons, when I'll have a competition practically every weekend. and I'm super excited for all that stuff, you know? But this summer has been great...probably the best summer of my life, and that's saying something considering last summer I went to Europe where I visited Paris and Schliersee Germany. But that's another story. Being stuck with your grandparents that aren't used to being with kids, especially someone of my age, for 2 weeks...it gets tiring, okay? Well, although all I've done this summer is sit around the house and occasionally go hang out with people (thats occasionally, meaning I haven't a lot at ALL), it's been a pretty decent summer. Kinda what summer should feel like, you know? Just...chillaxin' all the time. But I am ready for High School. I'm really nervous about it. People know who I am just because I'm some freshman that made Varsity show choir? I mean...I know that's kinda a good thing, but I don't want to be known as the chick with the voice. I don't even have that good of a voice, to tell the truth...I just...practice until I literally can't practice anymore, to be honest. But it's nervous-making. Ya know? High School isn't supposed to be easy. Middle School, truthfully, was a breeze for me. Although it had those emotional, "I'm-so-stupid-why-can't-anyone-love-me" moments, like everyone has in their middle school career, it was rather nice. Especially since I went from hard-core private school to laid-back public school. I'm so glad I switched schools. I was the freak at my old schools (as I've said before) and at public school, I fit in. Because there's more opportunities, and...I've got more options. There was no Show Choir, Choir, Theatre, or ANYTHING at my old schools. So...I'm thankful. I know everything happens for a reason...so..I might as well just keep my head up and grin and bare it, because no matter what comes my way, I'll be alright. I've got an amazing guy, friend's that'll stand by me, and parents that care. Even though sometimes it feels like I've got nothing, I gotta remember that.
This kinda sounds like one of those note-to-self type things. But whatever. One day I'll look back at this and gain more confidence. But I don't wanna be full of myself. It's so strange but I am SO SCARED of being full of myself. I don't want to think I'm awesome. I sorta want to be insecure. I know I've got talents...but telling myself I'm horrible makes me feel...humble. It makes me feel a little better about the winning. I mean...I'm not a sore winner...nor am I a sore loser. I can take a fall. I guess you could say I'm tough. (not in the physical way though...aha. I bruise easily. I'm like a peach. ooh that sounds nice. Woah, I get off topic way easily. Lets get back to the point and stop talking in parenthesis) So I think my goal in high school, is to be confident in myself, but not too confident. Practice, practice, practice, and keep up the good grades, so I can get into Juliard...my dream college. Be a good person. I want people to feel like they can come to me with anything and...trust me. I'm not the mean type. I kinda let people walk all over me. and that's another thing I want to fix. I need to start standing up for myself. I can't let other people do it. I've gotta stand my ground. So yeah...High School goals....
Can't wait to start working on them, but I'm also not eager for this perfect summer to end...
-Kiera
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